Post #2 by Christen57 » Tue Nov 08, 2022 6:05 am
The archetype needs a stronger common mechanic than "You can normal summon this card from your hand in face-up defense position". Here's what I have in mind.
Order of Mercy - Master Harmus's effect should be buffed from:
You can give 1 "Order of Mercy" - Monster from your side of the field back to your hand to normal summon this card in face-up defense position. If a monster your opponent controls attacks this card you can make your opponent gain 500 LP: The attacking monster is changed to defense position. In your 2nd Standby Phase after summoning this card: You can send this card to the GY: Special summon 1 "Order of Mercy - Grandmaster Harmus" from your Deck.
to:
Your opponent's face-up non-LIGHT monsters must attack if able. If you have no cards in your Extra Deck, you can Special Summon this card (from your hand or GY) in Defense Position by returning 1 "Order of Mercy" monster you control to the hand. If Summoned this way: You can Set 1 "Bad Reaction to Simochi" from your Deck or GY, and if you do, it can be activated this turn. You cannot Summon the turn you Special Summon this card, except LIGHT monsters. You must have no cards in your Extra Deck to activate and resolve the following effects.
● If a monster declares an attack: You can change it to Defense Position; your opponent gains 500 LP.
● During the Standby Phase: You can send this card to the GY; Special Summon 1 "Order of Mercy - Grandmaster Harmus" from your hand, Deck, or GY.
The archetype's common mechanics should be to force non-light monsters to attack, to special summon in defense instead of normal summoning in defense, and to set the required trap straight from the deck or graveyard, all for the simple cost of having no extra deck since this is intended to be a straightforward burn strategy.
Also, a monster's activation cost is ended with a semi-colon, not a colon, so it should be:
this card to the GY;
not:
this card to the GY:
Also, you misspelled Order of Mecy - Grandmaster Harmus's name. It should be "Mercy" instead of "Mecy," and its effect can be shortened from:
Cannot be normal summoned/set. Can only be special summoned by "Order of Mercy - Master Harmus". If this card leaves the field due to a card effect: Your opponent gains LP equal to the amount of the combined ATK of all monsters on the field. If there are no monsters your opponent gains 1000 LP. Once per turn, if a monster your opponent controls declares an attack: Negate the attack and your opponent gains LP in the amount of the monsters ATK.
to:
Cannot be Normal Summoned/Set. Must be Special Summoned by "Order of Mercy - Master Harmus". Your opponent's face-up non-LIGHT monsters must attack if able. If this card leaves the field by effect: Your opponent gains LP equal to the total ATK on the field, or 1000 LP instead if there are no face-up monsters on the field. Once per turn, if a monster declares an attack: Negate the attack, and if you do, your opponent gains LP equal to its ATK.
"Normal Summoned/Set" and "Special Summoned" are always capitalized. "Can only be Special Summoned" can be shortened to "Must be Special Summoned". "leaves the field due to a card effect" can be shortened to "leaves the field by effect" without including "card" there.
Order of Mercy - Priest Auredon's effect can be buffed from:
You can normal summon this card in face-up defense position. If your opponent controls a DARK-type monster you can special summon this card from your hand. As long as this card is face-up on the field, DARK-type monsters cant attack. In your Standby Phase: Your opponent gains 500 LP for each DARK-type Monster on the field.
to:
Your opponent's face-up non-LIGHT monsters must attack if able. If a face-up non-LIGHT monster is on the field and you have no cards in your Extra Deck, you can Special Summon this card (from your hand) in Defense Position. If Summoned this way: You can Set 1 "Bad Reaction to Simochi" from your Deck or GY, and if you do, it can be activated this turn. You cannot Summon the turn you Special Summon this card, except LIGHT monsters. During each Standby Phase: Your opponent gains 500 LP for each face-up non-LIGHT monster on the field.
This shouldn't prevent any attribute of monsters from attacking, as this archetype wants monsters to attack, not to be unable to. Also, "DARK" is too specific compared to just "face-up non-LIGHT".
Recommend these changes to the rest of your archetype's monsters to match the changes I suggested so far.
Order of Mercy - Nature Diza
Your opponent's face-up non-LIGHT monsters must attack if able. If you have no cards in your Extra Deck, you can Special Summon this card (from your hand) in Defense Position. If Summoned this way: You can Set 1 "Bad Reaction to Simochi" from your Deck or GY, and if you do, it can be activated this turn. You cannot Summon the turn you Special Summon this card, except LIGHT monsters. Once per turn: You can pick a player; they gain 800 LP, and if they do, you can shuffle any number of cards from your GY into the Deck. You must have no cards in your Extra Deck to activate and resolve this effect.
Order of Mercy - Novize Anahit
Your opponent's face-up non-LIGHT monsters must attack if able. If you have no cards in your Extra Deck, you can Special Summon this card (from your hand) in Defense Position. If Summoned this way: You can Set 1 "Bad Reaction to Simochi" from your Deck or GY, and if you do, it can be activated this turn. You cannot Summon the turn you Special Summon this card, except LIGHT monsters. During each Standby Phase: Your opponent gains 1000 LP.
Order of Mercy - Protecter Midho
Your opponent's face-up non-LIGHT monsters must attack if able. Your opponent cannot activate Spell/Trap Cards during Main Phase 1 while you have no cards in your Extra Deck. If you have no cards in your Extra Deck, you can Special Summon this card (from your hand) in Defense Position. If Summoned this way: You can Set 1 "Bad Reaction to Simochi" from your Deck or GY, and if you do, it can be activated this turn. You cannot Summon the turn you Special Summon this card, except LIGHT monsters.
The reason I decided to put that anti-spell/trap effect closer to the top instead of the bottom is to make the opponent more likely to see it and less likely to miss it since it heavily affects them.
Heaven on Earth's effect can be shortened from:
All face-up "Order of Mercy"-Monsters cant be destroyed by card effects. All face-up Monsters in defense position gain 500 DEF.
to:
Your Defense Position LIGHT monsters gain 500 DEF and are unaffected by your opponent's activated effects.
Also, you don't need a hyphen between an archetype's name and the "monster". So you can say "Order of Mercy" monster without any hyphen.
Bind the Lifeforce's effect can be shortened from:
Target 1 Spell/Trap on your side on the field and 1 Spell/Trap on your opponent side of the field. As long as one of the cards remains on the field, both cards cant be destroyed.
to:
Activate only if you have no cards in your Extra Deck. Select 1 other Spell/Trap on each field. While they both remain on the field, they cannot be destroyed.
Saying to pick a certain kind of card "on each field" is shorter than, and means the same as, saying to pick 1 of that kind of card on your field and 1 of that kind of card on the opponent's.
Although, that card seems awfully specific, as it needs the opponent to also be playing spells/traps that linger on the field after activation, so I may instead recommend deleting that spell since the archetype already seems large enough without it, and can easily run staples and stuff in that spell's place.
