Christen57 wrote:Tropiclands Child of Flames is too powerful/generic for a hand trap, being able to discard/banish itself from the hand to negate any spell/trap activation for free, and it isn't once per turn.
You seem to be using commas, colons, and semi-colons incorrectly. Colons should be for conditions, while semi-colons should be for targeting/costs and so on. Also a lot of your cards say things like send X card to the grave or banish X card but don't specify where you're sending/banishing from.
Teenage Tacticians is poorly-designed. It has an effect protecting itself from destruction by battle, yet still has another effect that requires it to be destroyed by battle in order to trigger? Why does it gain 300 ATK for each monster in your grave and 500 DEF for each monster on your field? That's tedious to keep track of. I would get rid of the DEF-boosting effect and just leave it with the ATK-boosting one. Also it shouldn't have 5 different effects that special summon.
Eeleeya, as well as the rest of your monsters, shouldn't say "After 2 turns, send this card back to your hand" because the opponent won't know if it goes back to the hand during the end phase of the second turn or the draw phase after the second turn. I would just make that effect be something like "Once per turn, during your opponent's End Phase: Return this card to the hand" without specifying any number of turns that would only make the effect more complicated that it needs to be. Where it says "but send 1 "Child Ops" card to your GY," you should specify where you are sending that card from, such as the hand or field or something like that. I would also get rid of the "it" in the part of the effect saying "If this card is equipped to "Child Ops - Teenage Tactitians", it can use 1 of these effects" because "it" could be mistaken for either the equipped monster or the equip card itself. I would change that effect to just:
Once per turn, if this card is equipped to "Child Ops - Teenage Tactitians": You can activate 1 of these effects.
● Inflict 1000 damage to your opponent, also banish this card.
● That monster gains 1000 ATK/DEF.
● Send this card to the GY; destroy 1 card on the field.
Sam's effect saying "If this card is destroyed by battle, inflict 200 damage to your opponent and gain 200 LP for every "Child Ops" monster in your GY" should specify if both the 200 damage and the 200 life point gain are based on "every Child Ops monster in your GY" or if it's just the life point gain effect that's based on that. So maybe it should say "If this card is destroyed by battle: Gain 200 LP for each "Child Ops" monster in your GY, also Inflict 200 damage to your opponent for each "Child Ops" monster in your GY."
June's effect, "This card can be equipped to a "Child Ops" monster; That monster cannot be destroyed by battle" needs to specify where it's equipping from if it's the hand or field, it should specify if it's a soft or hard once per turn, and it should say something like "A "Child Ops" monster equipped with this card cannot be destroyed by battle" so players know it won't give that battle protection to other random equipping monsters such as Relinquished.
I see no need for Trojan Ship to have "● Destroy 2 cards from your opponents side of the field ● Banish 2 cards from your opponents side of the field ● Destroy 1 card and banish 1 card from the field" all in a single card. I would get rid of that last bullet point effect and let it have just the effect that destroys 2 and the effect that banishes 2.
Welcome to Tropiclands looks like a very abusable card with too low of a cost, being able to search any level 3 or lower tuner in the game, such as the popular hand traps like Ash Blossom. I would at the very least restrict it to it's own archetype.
For the Motherland! is way too powerful, not once per turn, and can equip any monster with any monster from your graveyard. You can use Foolish Burial or Dragon Shrine to dump Dragon Buster Destruction Sword then use this trap card to equip the Dragon Buster to any monster, locking the opponent out of the extra deck, or some other crazy combo like that.
Ancient Architect's effect won't work on duelingbook since you currently can't mill cards from the bottom of the deck.
Messenger of Peace from a Distant Past is too powerful for a generic level 5 synchro monster. We already have Herald of the Arc Light which does pretty much what this does and is just as generic as this. Also there is no point in making this monster banish itself after 7 turns because you're likely going to be tributing/linking it off for something else long before that happens.
Your Link-2s are too powerful, being both generic and able to get up to 2 free searches for almost any spell/trap/tuner in the game upon being destroyed/banished that aren't once per turn, also the Link-4 shouldn't have 2 different board-wiping effects.
I read throught your post and first of all, thank you for taking the time so write all of this and thanks for the advices to improve my archetype and to nerf some of them. Second of all, I didn't use psct because currently I don't have patience to commit to something as complicated as problem solving card text and I made this just as a proof of concept, how monsters can equipped to a certain monster to use their effects. Also, you're completely right about me needing to specify from where I'm sending cards to the GY or where I'm banishing them from. Tons of people told me I'm not doing that and I always forget important things like that. And about "After 2 turns", I wanted my archetype to have a theme where they "retreet" after 2 turns since they're supposed to be an army of some kind and all that. Same think with "Child Ops - Teenage Tactitains", I wanted it to be some kind of a generator, or in theme "someone who commands other children" by equipping them to him and by doing that they gain some kind of effects which "technically", "Child Ops - Teenage Tactitians" do, but you activate effect from other cards they don't gain those effects, but I should've specified that
. I'll just leave all the cards as they are now and when I'm willing to use psct on them and change some of their effects to not be broken, I'll play them, but until them I won't ruin the fun for other people
. As for "Messenger of Peace from a Distant Past" and it being banished after 7 turns, that's also in theme but in its own where she comes from a distant past and after 7 turns or, how much time that would be if she was in some kind of story, leaves because she did everything she could to inform or send a message to people about something. This is a proof that cards cannot be both competitive and thematic at the same time xD
Again, thank you for taking your time to check out my cards
